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jemylThe postings of the past week or so have taught me some things. First and foremost I learned that there are wide differences in socially acceptable mores, depending upon where one lives on our planet, and even in my local area. For example, gay couples are far more acceptable and accepted in Gainesville, home of the University of Florida, just twenty-three miles to my west than they are in my neighborhood ---and they exist in both places. I imagine it is the same for transgender adults of either gender.
I also learned that the definition of what is old varies by one's age and group of friends and even, yes, where one lives. Where I live, in my group of friends and associates, I am mostly considered to be fairly young. The exception to this is some, not all, of our local firefighters, mostly aged twenty to thirty years, who think I am an old woman, though still fairly spry, who still thinks kind of young.
In those of my daughters' groups and locales, I am seen as rather old, maybe not quite all there, and with, of course, decidedly out of date ideas. One thinks I'm way too liberal and out there ----must then be losing it and not thinking straight. The other finds me once with it but old and so, of necessity, out of touch and so, of course, way too conservative, got to be ----must be, you guessed it, not quite thinking straight. In other words, I can win with neither of them.
Actually, I'm probably a little bit of both and not so much of either as they each think. I tend to be really middle-of-the-road in most of my thinking. The exception is the whole gay, lesbian, transgender, poly-amorous ways of living and engaging in relationships, sexual and otherwise i.e. living together as friends with or without benefits. There I have always been very, very liberal and accepting of any and all living arrangements, sexual (with permission of all) relationships among adults. Underage or child porn or sexual activity, except for those age 15 or so with each other, is still an outrage to me.
I may not be up on all of the accepted terminology and relationship status stuff of California or the transgender community. That doesn't mean that I don't understand or accept transgendered people. I don't have to be gay to understand that one cannot help whom they love or that two gay people deserve to be able to get legally married. That is just common sense. I have more trouble understanding why people wouldn't at least understand it. Whether or not they are willing to condone same might be a function of their ideas of what should or shouldn't be legal. Understanding is more basic than that.
I happen to see no reason why same shouldn't be legal. That is because I don't believe in pushing my religious beliefs onto another. I also believe that separation of church and state is a wise thing, at least as far as we have it now, i.e. regarding relationships between people in love.
I also would get into trouble with most of my friends, associates and neighbors on this matter. They see me as a bit daft to hold such a view. They want, for the most part, nothing to do with gays, lesbians, or what they consider adultery of any kind.
They mostly, thank goodness, take an ostrich-like view of it all. As long as it isn't talked about and they don't have to confront any of it directly they are happy ----heads in sand an oblivious. I say thank goodness because I know of some necessarily closeted people with active gay, lesbian, bi or poly lifestyles, who are also very active in my community. They just keep their activities quiet, or in Gainesville or Tampa or Orlando where they are both not known for their community activities here and living in a more accepting society.
We joke that our area is twenty or thirty years behind the times. Is is, and that has advantages and disadvantages. Where that is true for some electronics and utility services I get frustrated, frequently ---likewise for the acceptable love, gender, sex, living arrangement more's. Since it also means we seem to be less affected by some of the economic fluctuations quite so quickly which evens out the ups and downs quite a bit. That part I find comforting and quite nice.
Old fashioned ideas of family, reunions, people celebrating 20, 30, 50 and often 60 or more years married is nice. I just wish and hope it will eventually evolve to include that for gay, lesbian, bi and poly couples as well as those individuals who are transgender.
One of the things I also learned this past week I definitely don't like. That is the fact that there are still some very snobbish, judgmental people on these journal and forum sites. By that I mean those who like to post anonymous comments, screened, hoping for unscreening, on my journals and others' journals with very rude, almost if not downright snarky rhetoric. Interestingly and disgustingly to me, those same individuals, one of whom I refuse to name, go on closed sites and snipe and tear down me, my daughter and everyone who happens to disagree with them. To me that shows extreme immaturity. If I find that person commenting in the future, I will likely out them and/or refuse to engage. It is impossible to engage in any kind of decent give and take with someone who goes behind one's back, i.e. in a closed community, and tears one down there. It becomes dishonest instead of give and take and honest debate ----and they wonder why they are not taken seriously. Peace ---Ellen
I also learned that the definition of what is old varies by one's age and group of friends and even, yes, where one lives. Where I live, in my group of friends and associates, I am mostly considered to be fairly young. The exception to this is some, not all, of our local firefighters, mostly aged twenty to thirty years, who think I am an old woman, though still fairly spry, who still thinks kind of young.
In those of my daughters' groups and locales, I am seen as rather old, maybe not quite all there, and with, of course, decidedly out of date ideas. One thinks I'm way too liberal and out there ----must then be losing it and not thinking straight. The other finds me once with it but old and so, of necessity, out of touch and so, of course, way too conservative, got to be ----must be, you guessed it, not quite thinking straight. In other words, I can win with neither of them.
Actually, I'm probably a little bit of both and not so much of either as they each think. I tend to be really middle-of-the-road in most of my thinking. The exception is the whole gay, lesbian, transgender, poly-amorous ways of living and engaging in relationships, sexual and otherwise i.e. living together as friends with or without benefits. There I have always been very, very liberal and accepting of any and all living arrangements, sexual (with permission of all) relationships among adults. Underage or child porn or sexual activity, except for those age 15 or so with each other, is still an outrage to me.
I may not be up on all of the accepted terminology and relationship status stuff of California or the transgender community. That doesn't mean that I don't understand or accept transgendered people. I don't have to be gay to understand that one cannot help whom they love or that two gay people deserve to be able to get legally married. That is just common sense. I have more trouble understanding why people wouldn't at least understand it. Whether or not they are willing to condone same might be a function of their ideas of what should or shouldn't be legal. Understanding is more basic than that.
I happen to see no reason why same shouldn't be legal. That is because I don't believe in pushing my religious beliefs onto another. I also believe that separation of church and state is a wise thing, at least as far as we have it now, i.e. regarding relationships between people in love.
I also would get into trouble with most of my friends, associates and neighbors on this matter. They see me as a bit daft to hold such a view. They want, for the most part, nothing to do with gays, lesbians, or what they consider adultery of any kind.
They mostly, thank goodness, take an ostrich-like view of it all. As long as it isn't talked about and they don't have to confront any of it directly they are happy ----heads in sand an oblivious. I say thank goodness because I know of some necessarily closeted people with active gay, lesbian, bi or poly lifestyles, who are also very active in my community. They just keep their activities quiet, or in Gainesville or Tampa or Orlando where they are both not known for their community activities here and living in a more accepting society.
We joke that our area is twenty or thirty years behind the times. Is is, and that has advantages and disadvantages. Where that is true for some electronics and utility services I get frustrated, frequently ---likewise for the acceptable love, gender, sex, living arrangement more's. Since it also means we seem to be less affected by some of the economic fluctuations quite so quickly which evens out the ups and downs quite a bit. That part I find comforting and quite nice.
Old fashioned ideas of family, reunions, people celebrating 20, 30, 50 and often 60 or more years married is nice. I just wish and hope it will eventually evolve to include that for gay, lesbian, bi and poly couples as well as those individuals who are transgender.
One of the things I also learned this past week I definitely don't like. That is the fact that there are still some very snobbish, judgmental people on these journal and forum sites. By that I mean those who like to post anonymous comments, screened, hoping for unscreening, on my journals and others' journals with very rude, almost if not downright snarky rhetoric. Interestingly and disgustingly to me, those same individuals, one of whom I refuse to name, go on closed sites and snipe and tear down me, my daughter and everyone who happens to disagree with them. To me that shows extreme immaturity. If I find that person commenting in the future, I will likely out them and/or refuse to engage. It is impossible to engage in any kind of decent give and take with someone who goes behind one's back, i.e. in a closed community, and tears one down there. It becomes dishonest instead of give and take and honest debate ----and they wonder why they are not taken seriously. Peace ---Ellen
